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God's Playground

 We live in God's Universal playground. We at times miss the concept that we are too the products of the great inventor. That we too can build, construct, create ideas to plans, to models and plant into the word something new. 

 I'm on this journey to find healing and myself. I have cancelled out any distractions, from family, friends, and temporary lovers'; to  find solitude in the silence knowing god will speak to me. 

God created a playground we call the universe to work for us. At times we believe it's going against us too. The jungle Jim isn't everyone's strength and some of us get sick to our stomachs on the sea-saw.  The playground has something for all of us to enjoy. 

We are placed into the universe with the will to play at our own expense; to live, learn and to love but also to fail, unlearn, dislike and die. God created everything in a pattern like night to day, cold to heat and up from down. 

We evolve but at the same time we stay the same. We each hold a piece of the universe inside of us. Soul to soul, heart to heart even if we do not express in the same way or share the same values as others. We are connected; brought together to teach others a cold or pleasant lesson. Which is why we should be careful with the thoughts we carry about someone who has caused us harm or distaste.

 My struggle now is figuring out where my place is in God's universal playground. I do believe all things will be unfolded at the right time. I can't help but pick at the blindfold. I yearn for placement. I spend entirely too much time thinking, finding myself impatient. Questioning my destiny rather than just living in it. 

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The Help

For my Nephews and Ellie

  To my Sterling Boys and Brielle   I know a lot of time has gone by since you have seen me, just know In my heart you will always be. It’s so sad to write to you as if y’all aren’t here but adult drama fills the air.  I imagine you all have grown so big and strong, your childhood laugh warms my cold days and our memories together keeps me strong. I know I’m just your aunt but y’all will forever me my Bestfriend’s, the closest thing to my own children and Gods beautiful art.  I wonder what new things you have learned, what adventures you’ve taken? How many books have you read? Have you watched a good movie? How did you do in school virtually and what little pains you hold in your young hearts💜💜💜 I remember you all being so very smart, and I know your mothers are taking very good care of you. Please be patient with them because this time in life is hard for us all.  I shed tears writing this poem but it’s been weighing heavy on my mind. The only thought that I had was why did I have
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Belong To Me

 I am comfortable with the fact that no one belongs to me. It makes the challenge for love so much more sweet. The idea that someone is with you because they choose to be, is what makes it honorable even through those moments of misery.  I love, love, but can be complacent in such a fantasied daydream. I fight wars within myself to pull me back down to what I find as a rude awakening .  Some will find it odd that with all I have been through I still have the will to be so optimistic on a world that's shown me, the crooked and exposed me to some of mankind's ugliest ways. There aren't very many people who fearlessly  dream, tirelessly believe, or know how to balance transparency. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Belong to me because you want too. Wear my love like armor every where you go.  Choose me because its frees you, don't break my heart because it will always be yours. Be
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Home

He felt like home. Like grandpa’s hugs and granny’s kisses. Like a  school bus ride home, and  evening sunsets. Like afternoon Lunch with your Best-friends. He felt like home. Arms with an instant ease of peace, chocolate lips And a grin so sweet. He felt like ice cream on a summers day. He felt like a sunshine ray , and a Shooting stars runaway. He felt like home He felt like  Twilight, New Moon, and Breaking Dawn. He was was as high as the sky  and as bright as Nebula. He felt like why have I never felt this way before? He felt like a shower after a long day at work, like back-rubs And bath bomb soap . He felt like India’s Aries “Brown skin…  I can’t tell where mines is and where yours begins”. He felt like hopes redeeming  and pains end. He felt like home. Of course felt is past tense. But it’s still memorizing to dream of who we used to be. The trauma that can Happen when direct and in-direct meet. Like I’m saying things I don’t mean Because you act a certai
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