Skip to main content

Wolf


Which wolf will you feed? The savage beast or the angelic being…

At the age of 11 I had already grown to be pessimistic about life. I sat in the counselor’s office and remember telling her, “I always feel like I’m waiting for the second shoe to drop”. Life can be so good but there isn’t enough sugar to stop the metallic taste from reaching your taste buds. 

At the age of 15 I was distraught my mind and mouth were unionized to fight even if there wasn’t a war. I’m about to be 22 years old and still feel like the little girl who couldn’t trust the universe. I can say it’s even worse now because I feed myself optimism to drown out the part of me that needed to feel secure. Like big shit getting dismissed because we are all just humans trying to figure out which way to go. I sometimes wonder to myself... which wolf is more me?

The wolf who despises, burns bridges and criticizes. The one who as soon as they feel threatened starts throwing grenades and doesn’t care if the whole world burns after. The wolf that has pleasure in spiteful laughter. 
 The Savage beast is intensely bonded in my nature. Call it my mama don’t love me and daddy never knew me. Call it that nigga has his hands wrapped so tight around my throat I can’t breathe! Call it you aint never goanna be nobody! Call it roman noodles struggle food, call it hustle niggas we need toilet paper, clothes and shoes. Call it you a slut I know you been down to that planned parenthood. Call it I know you trying to go to school, but you can’t stay here no more. I don’t have to rewind too far to remember all the hate.

That godly angelic being flows within me but only if I give her chance to breath. She is that hello, goodbye and I hate to see a grow man cry let’s give it another try, she’s got that sweetness to her that would almost make her seem dumb, but it’s just installed for her to be giving, understanding and forgiving. I haven’t seen much of her lately. I think the savage beast hates her because it was that optimistic side that caused her to fight. It was the pureness that made it easier for the world to steal from her. Now the savage beast is guarding Bri. I can’t let no one steal my peace.  I need each wolf to be fed equally.

Equilibrium may the universe plant my back on my feet I need the history. I need all parts of me.

Comments

The Help

My BLACK IS

My black is beautiful. My black is powerful. My black is intellectual and spiritual.  My black is white, brown, green, yellow, and purple. My black Is universal; a movement to the moon.  My black is a song: a rhythmic blues. My black is strong and unapologetic. My black is love and hate tied bitterly sweet. My black is pleasurably pain. My black is momentum, my black is silently pleasant and loudly intolerable. My black is deep like blue and curvy like spoons. My black is still water and moving tides. My black is closely and remotely Beautiful.

False Prophet

  False Prophet He speaks words full of fire thats strong enough to burn the soul.  Tongue filled with promises that turns any woman’s cold heart into gold. I am a God! King of kings and upon the flick of my fingers you will be cursed fool!  Weep at the bend of my knees, you as a woman should shower me! Fulfill my desires and expect no Loyalty from me the Unholy God of Kings of Kings. False Prophet cant you see, my soul can not be altered by man whose flesh ages and bleeds. I am a Queen made from the father of land. Coil me in dirt and see my true skin.  Wrench the water of Poseidon from out of me down your legs and turn back into the weakened flesh that binds you to sin. Open your eyes and see the breath of life in my air! The reigns of passion boiling in my heart and the 3rd eye between my brows that causes you to turn away from me. Be aware of your played out interactions, selfish satisfaction and the unsolicited grievance you bring onto yourself. Look at the beautiful black Queens

Im Not Supposed to Think Of You

I wonder if you know how true I could be to you You just don’t know how you freed me I am no longer imprisoned in my head Every day I challenge my mind and try to do away with wasteful thinking but... I’m not supposed think of you Slow, long kisses those are my favorite. When your lips touch mines a million stars start to shine. I can’t help but think do you feel like it’s that amazing?   I catch a glimpse of you, head tilted, hands gripping my thighs, so much passion through those glasses. Those soft lips and gorgeous brown eyes.   I feel your energy clashing with mines. Your sensuality with my sexuality it’s a match that can’t be denied.   When we entwine we send the heavens shaking disrupting the angel’s peace. I wish I could keep you with me   But I’m not supposed to think of you It’s not just the intimacy that I’m attracted too, it’s that big beautiful brain that blows me away. Something about the knowledge you keep that has me wanting more and more of yo